Three steps

Last day I was feeling sometimes all our life has just few basic steps we follow..
3 basic steps of our life...

1. Jump and do what we want to do.. - will do according to our wish to attain what we want right now.... Even though its so clear its so stupid to do it...
2. Find reasons and hopes which made us go for it.. - this is the major thing which we do and give maximum strain for... We have to gain support from others and make others and ourself believe we had a proper plan..
3. Declare plan failed only because of some external source and find new way to get out of problem.. - this is extension of second step... We will declare only because of someone else's troubles we reached to the trouble for our plan... and suddenly jump to step 1 doing something which we feel right then... :)

Save My Child!!!

Recently I noticed an ad in yahoo(God of disturbing ads, I hate this company for aggressive and stupid ads). The ad looked so catching... its some two hands coming out from a dark cell calling for help. I checked the link(hihi I never wish yahoo to get few cents for my click) it was some http://www.rescueaditya.org. 

First impression I had in mind was that it's some guy who is caught in jail or so and pleeding a country to free him. Then I read this is a kid of 10 yrs or so. Oh some country caught him mistakenly? Eagerly I went to site and started reading.

Now my shock was doubled. It's some story that this kid's mother took him away from his father. For that someone gave ad in yahoo?? Real wonder. Now it was a series of wonders.. Heights of stupidity I would love to call even though its my own feeling over it and you can say its wrong for sure. But really I felt like laughing or cry. 

A man, some Dr.Y complain that his son - aditya is being kidnapped by his mother who is "Remarks and caution: Mentally severely ill. Public must not apprehend her directly. Contact police or the nearest American Embassy. Highly violent and suicidal. Police officials must put her on 24 hour suicide watch upon apprehending her."

Then I went through the site. It was purely one sided. Parents were fighting. So US court gave equal custody of kid to both mother and father. Now having kid with her, she leave to India. So he went to court and got full custody of kid as she couldnt come and present to court. With this court order, he gave complaint in FBI and then to Indian court. Site itself complains she is dangerous and "She moved Aditya from place to place to avoid tracing. Past 18 months 

she subjected to Aditya to live in seedy hotels which she changed often." 

I don't how you guys will feel when reading something like a woman is moving place to place and living without getting traced, but really image that came to my mind is that someone is chased so much... Site shows a letter from a psycologist saying she seemed unstable and feeling his father abuse kid and attack. I don't know why this should be considered as severely metally ill :D... 

Of course I don't know... May be all these people who know her more might be knowing much.. But I felt sad for her somehow... Even though I felt no one supports her on the face of earth... may be just the claim of site. 

Only doubt I had was: A woman gets married with a man in US... of course he marries as she is fine... Have a kid also... I don't think they didn't talked before having kid. Now when kid is around 10 yrs old, she became mentally ill... that too reason is that she fears her kid will be sexually abused by his father. How a woman who was married to a man start feeling unsafe like this? And if he get to know that he is unstable, why he never tried to help her by giving some care atleast medical care? He thought of getting a proof that she is mentally unstable only when he wanted to custody of kid? I really feel she had some bad 10 yrs that made her unstable if she became one. The people behind who is so concerned that kid is not sent to school for 18 months are pleading doctors, school administrators not to allow either kid or mother to be admitted with them or never talk... Just call US people and they will come with army and take the illegal to jail.. :D Really they are not concerned whether kid is getting what he needs... In the hunt for the lady, they are making kids like more harder... Why they feel kid won't be good with her? Just the same she suspect about the father.. 

I feel if they really want kid to be fine, they should stop this stupidity and allow her to live... then kid will be going to school... some way it will be a better condition than this I guess... May not be a heaven that his father can give him... 

Really do you love the kid or want to power to have kid?

For the same cause - To make my heaven to all

I know it’s late, but still I want to write because this is staying in my mind for long... Two incidents that happened recently that hurt me. Both happened in same month.

1. China calls Dalai Lama "saboteur" of Tibet development
   
2. Mangalore pub attack (Jan 24, 2009).
   

Usually I don't look to news papers or read news papers... Somehow I have a feeling most of them are made as big news and part of their business. But somehow I saw this news and really made me feel so bad and sad... 

When I read what China called Dalai Lama, I really felt like laughing out. They saying they wanted to make an area develop and have high ways and bridges and rail. That’s why they didn't allowed the native people to live as they want :) Chinese people were considered to be having brains. Anyway its part of their politics and its 50 years that they started occupation in Tibet to make the place 'heaven'... “Making their leader exile”. Not allowing journalists or outside people to know how is the life in the 'heaven'...  - Just to allow people to have the fruit of development.. 

Few girls chased and beaten by a gang of 40 men saying they are drinking in pub. Actually it was a way to make a party known to society and start a discussion. So SriRama sena got some public attention and leaders became leaders than just gundas and became some people who are standing for some cause - "Protect culture..." - Just to save people from fruit of development.

I really felt both done by similar people and basic mentality has real similarity. 

• Both people want power
• Both try to gain the power by attacking and scaring people
• Both the suffering people won’t ever accept what power people doing to them, other than that they can't protest on their attack
• ..... List really continues...

Somehow there are some people who want to gain the power. Power over others... and gain the monetary and other benefits of power. Really sometimes I don't know what we gain from all these... May be someday I will also have power, maybe I have the power today itself and might be attacking some people. 

But this type of attack is not very rare... When Taliban impose Islam rule in Pakistan valleys and Afghanistan, suddenly one day girl kids won't be able to go to school. Taliban should allow a place where those who don't want to accept their rule to be imposed live. China is saying about making heaven. Why don't they do an election and see if any of its leaders can win over Lama? haha how many of us know any Chinese leader? I think lot more people will be knowing Lama... 

When you say about Taliban, you can't really show America as angels too. They might be true but war making them part of power too. Killing or attacking people who believe in Taliban principle is part of same agenda... "Scared whether other will eat me."

It's true we can't give everyone freedom. But why we can't have a law which gives all people more freedom which won't really curb fellow being's freedom?

Why are we here?

"Why are we here?"

This looks a very simple question and really feel like it's easy to answer this. But I feel this is one of the most dangerous question we can face any moment of life... 

Whether we are in office, whether we are in church, whether we are in pub, whether we are in hotel, really this question can really make us restless...

I felt the power of this question recently while I was on a trek. I was not expecting it be this powerful but could make me almost fall down without any power to walk too... When I started the trek I was saying this statement to friends just as a fun... "Why are we here, we could have been in Bangalore - sleeping, eating nice food etc" (other options :)) We all took it fun too... But after sometimes we are getting tiered and the thought was going deep to our minds... really felt it... At a point I saw a tree which can save me from deadly sun... So I went upto that and lyed down under it thinking whether to go or not. Now I really found its difficult to answer the question... Why are we here?... We always have a better option which we left... Some other thing rather than this... But danger is that this other thing is also under the power of the same question. So I thought how to fight against this question and whats the best answer.. Atlast I found a suitable one which is also so vaugue... 

"Who knows whether we can do this later? May be we wont be able to do this later, won't be able to do this for ever... " 

This is really so valid thought too... Because no one can say what will happen for us tomorrow... Simply we can make ourself think this is the best time to do it and we will do this now itself.. :D But I feel myself as the most confused person how to live today..

What if we have power?

I was just imagining some time if we had power... :D ya power to go back to past and go to future. Oh man, I think then both nostalgia and fantasies will not have a moment of excistance. May be none of our fantacies might be perfect nor as good as we feel about it. Fantacies we change every time when we win the destination of our fantacy, we just kill that and start fantacying something different from that. 

 Nostalgia is much safer in this sense. We can't go back and reach the situation when we feel the best time of our life. So we won't be able to realize that we don't really want the same. May be I think its so close with the thought that we need to learn to live today... 

Happy that I don't have the power so that I feel I don't have a better tomorrow or didn't had a better past and live for 'something'....

A New Year, Are we really interested?

I am seeing that one new year is approaching us. But I am really confused seeing people. Are we really waiting for a whole year? I guess a lot of us are really busy and not really thinking we have a whole year ahead. I feel like we becoming more more ambitious. We wanna become a lot in minimum time. Are we bored of what we are? I see most people want to be millionires in a day or so. They don't want to be like this... work hard to meet their expenses. We wanna be rich so that we can be lazy? I am hearing a lot of people talking very similar topic. They have loan which they want to close soon. I think its really good that these people have loans and pending amounts... Other wise they gonna sit idle and will reduce the productivity that much. 

So let me wish all people have a hard year so that we get used to with living hard paths... 

I still need more walks...

I used to think I am powerful and I can really take any real bad situations. Used to be a person who show to take things so lightly. When people tell of job cuts, I used to be smiling and saying if there is job cut in my company or my profession, still there are lot of option, try another company or may be even another job. Live accordingly. When it was Mumbai explosion too I heard some people feeling too much and I was scolding them saying 'why is this much big cry?' Whats logic in thinking what will happen if I am accused someday of some terrorism? what will be the result of dangerous situations? Won't it make our land filled with suspicious eyes? 'Let it happen we will see when it happens'.. Anyway we can't stop the time when we have to die... Until then it's waste to live fearing of it....

Last day some how I was just sitting bored @ office and though of song of movie 'Kannathil Muthamittal' named 'Vidai Kodu Engal Naadae'... I loved the music for the song as it was kinda senti song... I downloaded the song and checked for lyrics just to read as I was sitting bored anyway. Then I read in a site english translation and lyrics. English translation really strike me so fast and make me read whole. 

http://www.lankanewspapers.com/news/2008/8/31867_space.html

O our motherland, Bid us a farewell 

The house whose entrance is cleaned by the sea 

O our palmyra trees... O birds` nests 

will we ever meet again? 

We buried our smiles in our lips 

We buried our life in our bodies 

We are making a procession like empty skeletons.... 

Even with the rags,is there any pleasure 

better than lying on the lap of the mother? 

Even if we go to heaven, will there be freedom 

as our own village and cities! 

The land we opened our eyes is there! 

Where is the land, where we will close our eyes? 

Lets separate, O rivers... We`ll be back if we survive

If our motherland calls us again, we will come back 

we are seeing the land of our birth with teary eyes, 

for the last time 

We lost our music in the cries of our children 

We buried our moon in the smoke and fumes generated by the bombs 

Early in the night, we were enjoying the flowers 

Later in the night, we were torn by the thorns 

O our Sea birds we will meet again if we are alive, 

O blue skies, forests and mountains, 

we will meet again if we are alive 

We carry less on our head but our heart heavily 

burdened, as we leave! 

vidai kodu engaL naadE 

kadal vaasal theLikkum veedE 

panai mara kaadE, paRavaigaL koodE 

maRumuRai oru muRai paarpoama? 

udhattil punnagai pudhaithoam 

uyirai udambukkuL pudhaithoam 

veRum koodugaL mattum oorvalam pogindroam 

kandhal aanaalum thaay madi poal 

oru sugham varuma? varuma? 

soRgam sendraalum sondha oor poal 

oru sudhandhiram varuma? varuma? 

kaN thiRandha dhesam angae 

kaN moodum dhesam engae? 

pirivoam nadhigaLae pizhaithaal varugiRoam 

meeNdum thaayagam azhaithaal varugiRoam 

kaNNeer thiRaiyil piRandha maNNai 

kadaisiyaaga paarkindroam 

engaL sangeetham piLLaiyin azhugaiyilae tholaithoam 

engaL iLam thingaL vedikuNdu pudhaiyilae pudhaithoam 

mun nilavil malaril kidandhoam, 

pin iravil muLLil kizhindhoam 

kadal neer paRavai dhaan irundhaal sandhippoam 

vanamae malaigaLae vaazhndhaal sandhippoam 

thalaiyil konjam nenjil adhigam 

sumaigaL sumandhu poagindroam 

It suddenly made me remember my chat friend whom I just had talk for few days... She used to tell fight wont ever stop and is bad situation. Really I just started imagining how it will be not sure whether we will return back in the evening or not. It's not just death... it's more than that. Even if we see few people in next bus is killed in a blast or so, we have to continue our daily things as it's somewhat common thing. I don't care who wins or whoz true. But both set of people will be suffering from the outcome. I don't know such a nice place of budhist be place of bloods... Would I be cool and calm if situations around me were like this? I don't think so at all... I get frustrated sometimes with the 'stupid' horns itself :)... and I think I am soo cool with situations... Really I am stupid and very sensitive person and I just know I am not that brave... 

Each time when people fwd mails saying if you fwd this mail for 15 people, you will get your wish granted... I am gonna send 100 people wishing fights in Lanka and other place be over soon... and no on lose their own mother and mother land...